Living abroad is an adventure and a challenge. Every day there are new challenges to face, new adventures to be had. There is certainly never a lack of laughter (usually at ourselves) and never a lack of trust in God. We have had to realize that there is nothing that we can do in our own strength, and that a constant stream of prayer is always necessary if we are going to survive!:) Read along and have a good laugh on us!

1. Living abroad is marriage therapy. Seriously. I recommend that all young couples spend some time abroad together during their first year of marriage. There is a special bond that is formed when your spouse is the only other person who speaks English in the city!

2. How to you say baking soda in Spanish? How did I graduate with a Spanish degree and not learn how to say baking soda? Oh, and how about yeast? During our first month in Peru, I became a hunter of baking soda and yeast. I just want to make some homemade bread. Some muffins. Some cookies. The process was long and hard. After going to the market, the corner store, the supermercado, and failing every time, I FINALLY found bread yeast. A kind, dear soul had mercy on me and pointed me in the direction of the chinese venders. The chinese! They are the ones who have the yeast, yall. I bought two packs of yeast and rejoiced. Homemade bread has never tasted so good.

3. Our light bill was 4 dollars last month. Yes, 4 dollars. How cool is that? The only problem is that we had no idea how to pay it. Hmmmm… where to go? What to do? We asked a few friends, and they all seemed to have a different light company than ours. What about our water bill? Same thing. We are the Americans. We have NO clue how to do anything here. We have accepted it and decided to be cheerful and just laugh at ourselves when we don’t know. It makes life more fun :). We finally learned that you can pay not only your lights, but also your water, at the ATM! Seriously, all you have to do is find an ATM and follow the directions on the screen to pay your bill. You then insert cash into the ATM and it gives you change, kind of like those self checkouts at walmart! Lesson learned.

4. We are missionaries, and we are always talking about Jesus and how awesome He is. The only problem is that we have no idea how to say any names in the Bible. How do you say James and Simon Peter in spanish? What about Nebuchadnezzer? Did I even spell that right in English? My studies live on after graduation- I am currently learning all of the Biblical names, places, cities, etcetera. May the Lord help me, haha!

5. There is never a rush in Peru. We are on Peruvian time. Chris and I showed up to church a few times about 30 minutes before the service started… that was before we learned that if the service starts at 7, no one arrives at church until 7:30, and then the praise and worship lasts for an hour, and the preacher starts preaching at 8:45. The early bird does not get the worm here. He waits patiently in the street until someone arrives to unlock the church, 15 minutes after the service should have started. Yes.

6. How do I choose the right kind of potato? How do I know which one makes potato soup and which one makes french fries and which one makes sweet potatoes? This is the potato experiment of my life. When one goes to the market and is given the choice of 20 different kinds of potatoes, when one is actually only used to the idaho, the russet, and the good ol’ sweet potato, one has no other choice but to do potato experiments. They have actually turned out great so far, broadening our potato eating horizons forever.

7. Those awkward moments when you accidentally say “AMEN!” In church and everyone stares at you because obviously the Americans misunderstood what the pastor was saying and said amen in a totally awkward moment. It’s cool. No condemnation in Christ.

8. The difference between being a short term missionary and a long term missionary. Short term missionaries are not allowed to eat the meat or the fruit from the street. We are SO careful no to eat any of it. We are not allowed to buy it, or share it, or touch it…. because it is very likely that we will get sick! However, long term missionaries enter into a whole new set of rules. It is now rude to refuse any food. Seriously, in Peru, it is rude if you refuse food and rude if you do not eat every single bite on your plate. Every bite. I have been served guinea pig, chicken hearts, cow stomach, chicken feet, and many different types of mystery meat. I have a few strategies. Number one, I pray over it to rid it of any diseases, Lord help me! Then, I try to sneak it onto Chris’ plate while he isn’t looking. If that doesn’t work, I pass it off to whatever kids are around me at the time because they always want the extra food. And if you are wondering, yes there have been times when I ate it. There is no other way out people. Don’t judge me.

9. Peruvian worship services and being pregnant.
Seriously, yall, they just don’t go together. I try. If you have ever been to Peru with the teams, you are understanding every word right now, and laughing. The worship services at church are fun and awesome, don’t get me wrong, but I am pregnant, and standing up and jumping around for an hour is harder for me now that it was before lol! Whereas in the US we sing 3 or 4 songs on any given Sunday, here in peru there are always at least 8. And they all involve jumping, running around the church, marching, waving flags, you get the picture. I’m getting my exercise and worshiping the Lord at the same time 😉

10. Why does everyone always put the whole chicken foot in my soup? Really. I love soup. But please leave out the toes.

11. Being pregnant in Peru means that any time you go eat at anyones house, you have to eat double. Double everything. I try to tell them, I just can’t do it, but they are firm. They are relentless. Usually Chris has to carry me out of there because I have eaten so much that I can’t walk… and probably a few unidentified parts of the chicken.

12. There are no electric stoves. How do you cook with gas? No clue. How do you buy gas? No clue. We finally figured it out though. A friend showed us how to hook up a gas tank to our stove, and then we learned that you have to order gas when you run out, and a guy comes to deliver the gas to your house, on a bike. Yes, that’s right, a bike. He deserves a tip.

13. Celsius. Celsius. Celsius. Learning to talk about the weather in Celsius. Learning to cook in celsius. Oh yes. At my first doctors appointment here, they asked me my height and weight. In centimeters and kilograms. I just had to laugh at myself and tell them I had no idea!

14. Everyone thinks we are rich. It’s weird. I have never been the rich kid. I am number one thrifter, yard sale shopper, all my clothes come from goodwill, proud of it, you get the picture. I am the bargain hunter, the one who eats food from my yard and eggs from my chickens. But here, everyone thinks I’m rich. People make comments about it all the time. The taxi drivers try to charge me 4 times the regular price! It’s weird, but compared to the rest of the world, most Americans are in the top 4 percent of the wealthiest people group. So I am rich, comparitively.

15. We tried to buy bathing suits. Worst thing ever. I just wanted to buy a cool one piece, you know, something modest, but super cool, and finally I found this super awesome baithing suit, 5 bucks, it was a strapless sweetheart top, nude color, really cool bathing suit. I loved it. I got an XL and went to try it on. And then I realized… XL here is totally the equivalent of a Small in the US. Or maybe an XS. I am not just saying that. Seriously, peruvians are tinyyyyyy people. I am half a foot taller than most of the men. What did I expect. Ok, so I gave up, and we moved on to Chris. Let’s look for some shorts for him to wear to the beach. The largest size that most stores had was a size 32 waist. So the big dude wears a 34. We are giants here, I have accepted it. No bathing suits for us. LOL.

16. I am on day 74 of life without hot water. Hot showers are a thing of the past. Bathtubs are unheard of here. Day 74 of life without a dryer, without central heating and air, without hair dryers or straighteners. We don’t have a dishwasher. Who really even needs dishwashers?! There are no boxed things here- no brownies, no cookies. So here’s to hand washing and hang drying, to making food from scratch and to learning to live in harmony with the climate. Here’s to the simple life, where I am learning to live with less and to be content in every moment. (& here’s to that next hot shower that is waiting for me out there somewhere, oh how I look forward to our next moment together)

Throughout all of these things, I have cried a few times, been super frustrated, laughed hysterically, given up, tried again, experienced failure and victory. The upside of it all is that Chris and I are closer than ever. He’s the only other English Speaker, and sometimes I just need to make a joke and have someone laugh at it. He is my life saver. And we have both learned to trust God in every situation, to go without, to make the most of the journey. And we are. We are making the most of it, we are learning and loving and living. We are changing and growing and becoming. And it is wonderful, in the midst of the mess and the chaos, God is here and He is wonderful.

So here’s to life and love and laughing at ourselves and living abroad, may God continue to help us every day! 😉

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